Sex dating and relationships a fresh approach
The great compromise of contemporary evangelical sexual ethics is that we have justified foreplay as a legitimate part of pre-marital relationships.This doesn’t hold up theologically or scripturally, and it certainly doesn’t work pragmatically.And this doesn’t mean only abstinence from sexual intercourse, but abstinence from all sexual activity. The problem with viewing a dating relationship as its own distinct category of relationship is that—being a modern invention—it lacks any explicit scriptural boundary regarding sexual relations.
So I don’t recommend engaged couples, still months from their wedding, spending too much time thinking or talking about sexual intimacy, or even allowing their thoughts to wander in that direction for too long.
Foreplay is meant to propel us toward consummation.
It shouldn’t surprise us that evangelical teens and singles are struggling to maintain sexual purity; we’ve basically said it’s OK to begin having sex, just as long as they don’t finish. In addition to exacerbating sexual impropriety, you also argue that dating relationships tend to create unhealthy emotional expectations. A primary concern of the book is to help pre-engaged couples keep their wits about them.
For instance, most Christian women won’t make out with just any guy; but they will make out with their boyfriend. In short, we can’t slap the label “dating” on a male/female relationship and then justify engaging in sexual activity that we would otherwise deem inappropriate between unmarried men and women.
So if “the bounds of the neighbor relationship are binding until marriage” (p.