Sex dating rules
Also, I hate that sexual double-standard where it's implied that women "give" sex to men. I think it's up to the two folks to determine how long they can date w/o hitting the sheets. I think it's up to the two folks to determine how long they can date w/o hitting the sheets.Sex should be equal - two people wanting to be intimate with each other. To that I say...'Don't give away the salami for free'. "Why do I have to buy the cow if I am getting the milk for free? "Why do I have to buy the BULL if I am getting the beef for free? To that I say...'Don't give away the salami for free'. "Why do I have to buy the cow if I am getting the milk for free? "Why do I have to buy the BULL if I am getting the beef for free?If you are not promiscuous or such lifestyles don’t align with your values, that is fine, but please don’t judge.Respectfully acknowledge your different values so you can part ways and each find someone more in line with your values I share this here with the hope that it may help folks find comfort when dating and entering into a new relationship...Rob and I will go out on our 4th date tonight :) Peace y'all, Denise What a lovely story, Denise! Congrats on reaching your true self and braving the dating world with comfortable success.I can totally relate to how you used to approach dating, feeling like you only have your appearance to offer. Your comment has really made me think about my self-worth and how I interact with men... The reality is, both genders are addicted to scripts that were forged from early life history experiences.
So I had the big birthday and coincidentally went out on a first date 10 days later and instead of heart palpitations and a low cut top, I decided to be comfortable inside and out!
and Claude Steiner's Scripts People Live might be a good place to start for anyone interested.
In a nutshell, in TA scripts are different than you've got them -- they result from longterm persistent low level programming by the parent of the opposite sex. (This model goes back to before the disintegration of the two-parent family began.) So a mother will tend to script a son to be like his maternal grandfather, possibly emphasizing his good qualities and excising his bad ones, depending on the mother's relationship with her father and her adult perspective.
But because playing a game necessarily translates into masking your authentic self, these rules cannot deliver the kind of genuine partnership on which true love is built.
Instead, following bogus rules when it comes to dating invariably leads to one of two ill-fated consequences: Playing the game culminates in a kind of bait-and-switch in which one member of the new couple tends to feel duped; or one person continues to operate behind a façade so that he or she never becomes fully known by a partner and ends up locked in a one-sided relationship. It is important to have boundaries and to not reveal more or do more than you are completely comfortable with.